Start here. Grow far.

When it's all said and done we're on the same side

There is such controversy among doctors and parents about whether or not vaccines cause autism. I've done some research. I've read lots from both sides of the argument. And I'm not convinced that vaccines cause autism. But I'm also not convinced that vaccines do not cause autism. And, in addition, I have concerns about injecting my baby with chemicals and questionable substances.

From Generation Rescue's web site:

"Many vaccines contain other toxic substances including ethylene glycol (antifreeze), phenol (a disinfectant dye), benzethonium chloride (a disinfectant), formaldehyde (a preservative and disinfectant), and aluminum (another known neuro-toxin). Further, some viruses used in vaccines are cultured in animal tissue including chicken albumin and monkey liver."

Both sides of this debate feel strongly (to put it mildly) about their position. And parents get caught in the confusing middle.

According to the AAP's web site, antifreeze is not an ingredient in vaccines:

"Q. Do vaccines contain antifreeze?
A: No. Antifreeze is typically made of ethylene glycol, which is unsafe. Polyethylene glycol (a
chemical used in antifreeze and personal care products like skin creams and toothpaste) is
used in vaccines and is safe. It is used to inactivate the influenza virus in some influenza
vaccines. It is also used to purify other vaccines."

What's a parent to do? Who can you believe?

I'd been fretting for weeks, knowing that my son's 12-month pediatrician visit was looming. I knew that our pediatrician, who begrudgingly allows my alternative vaccination schedule, would press us to accept the MMR (measles, mumps, rubella) vaccine. I didn't want him to get it. I prepared myself for a fight and I knew that one possible outcome would be for our doctor to dump us from his practice. That was a chance I was willing to take although I do like and respect this doctor and would have hated to find someone new.

But when it's all said and done, as a parent, you have to go with your gut. And my gut's been telling me that our son is not ready for several of these vaccines.

When our doctor reminded me, at the start of our visit, that Waylon was due for three shots (a total of five vaccines, three of which are live viruses) I told him that, actually, Waylon was not having any shots today. I explained that I'm not saying no to these vaccines forever. I realize their importance both for my son and for the larger community in which we live. But I am not ready for my baby boy to receive all of these vaccines just yet. I want time for his immune system to grow and mature. He is breast-fed, he is home with me and I see no reason why a baby this young with minimal exposure to disease needs that many vaccines at one visit. Autism concerns and questions aside, I have grave reservations about injecting three live viruses into my baby all at once and stressing out his immature immune system.

Our pediatrician, while not thrilled with my decision, went along with it. He wasn't snarky or nasty or combative. He just shrugged his shoulders, said he wished he could change my mind and then pressed his practice's pro-vaccine literature into my hand once again. I respect him and listen to his arguments for the vaccines each time we visit him. And, thankfully, he respectfully listens to my concerns without making me feel like a crackpot.

I know that doctors believe in supporting the AAP and the status quo. I know they believe that administering vaccines is in the best interest of our children and of all children. But I hope our doctor also understands that by educating myself about vaccines, by researching them and, yes, even by questioning the schedule and the ingredients in them that I am doing what is in the best interest of my child. No parent should be faulted for that.

[photo credit: The Delaney Diaries]

Pride

No matter your political affiliation, your color, your religion or even your personal beliefs, it had to be difficult not to be proud of America today as we collectively watched our 44th president be sworn into office.

I planned to watch the proceedings from my home office while the babysitter watched our kids (and probably Noggin) in the living room. But right before the ceremony began I felt an urge to share this special  moment with my kids.

My 3 1/2 year-old daughter, sadly, could not be persuaded. She opted to watch Miss Spider's Sunny Patch something-or-other instead. The baby only wanted to nurse. So I watched our nation make history, inaugurating our first African American president, while sitting next to our South African babysitter (she's a resident but not yet a citizen of the U.S.). She said that although she's a Republican she plans to support our new president because that's what good Americans do. Sounds to me like she's on the right path to becoming a citizen of this great nation of ours.

Good luck and God be with you, President Obama. I can't wait to see what your presidency will do, and what we as citizens will accomplish, to lift us up and make us proud to be Americans again.

[photo credit: AP Photo/Elise Amendola]

The Classy Closet loves Baby Potential!

View The Classy Closet's vlog to hear what owner Jen Hinton has to say about Baby Potential onesies!

Can't blame it all on the baby

I recently read somewhere that mothers lose 450-700 hours of sleep during their baby's first year of life. First of all, that's insane. That's almost a whole month! Why are humans not extinct? Second of all, it must be true because that's at least what I've lost in sleep this past year.

Our daughter was a dream baby. She started sleeping through the night around 6 weeks of age and almost never had trouble falling or staying asleep. Even now, at nearly four years of age, she's a great sleeper.

But our son, born just over a year ago, has never slept very well. Between his newborn sleep issues that turned into CIO issues and then swaddle issues and that have now become his screaming-for-an-hour-or-two-every-night-for-no-obvious-reason issues, I am severely sleep deprived.

But, lately, I have to take some of the blame for not getting enough winks. You see, after we put the kids to bed I stay up late to work, to play, to watch TV, to talk to my husband, to catch up on Facebook, to read, to blog. The evenings are my only ME time I get and I cherish them. But night after night of staying up until nearly midnight and then waking when Waylon cries out at 1:30 a.m. or 3:30 a.m. is killing me. If I were smart I'd go to bed right after he and his sister do, around 8:00 p.m.

Last night, because I was a zombie who could barely focus on the TV let alone understand what was happening on it, I did just that. I climbed into bed at 9:00 p.m. and didn't take my beloved laptop with me. I didn't turn on Sex & the City reruns or watch a Seinfeld episode for the 313th time. I read a little of my book then turned off the light and went to sleep. Eight blissful, mostly uninterrupted, hours later I woke up. I felt rested and refreshed and I was amazed at how good it felt to sleep longer in one stretch than I had in over a year. Today my head was clear. I had more patience with my kids. I wasn't constantly sleepy.

So although it would be easy to blame that sweet little boy of mine for all of my sleep deprivation issues, really, it was the fault of my laptop. And Twitter. And Goodreads. And The Bachelor. And Facebook. And...well, OK. I guess it was just me.

[photo credit: SXC]

How do you know when you're done?

Catherine, at Her Bad Mother, recently posed the question, how do we ever know if/when we're done expanding our family? For me, this question was answered easily, after my son, my second child was born. Before he was born, heck--before he was conceived--I drove my husband crazy with talk of having another child. Something inside told me our family was not complete. Maybe it was hormones but I like to think it was mother's intuition telling me that our family was one short, that Waylon needed to be born. And although there was a brief period of postpartum bliss during those days in the hospital with Way when I thought I might want another child, the feeling was fleeting. My on-the-job training where I learned to be a mother to two taught me that two is all I can handle. And while some people have more than two children and are great at it, I'm glad I've learned my limits.

Now that Waylon is a year old, I'm happy to report that my certainty about being done having kids is constantly being reinforced: when I attend baby showers and don't yearn to be the swollen-ankled center of attention; when I drop into maternity shops to buy nursing bras and don't feel wistful that I'll never need their pre-natal yoga classes or cute mommy-to-be clothes again; when I visit friends in the hospital who've just had a baby and I don't wish I was the one holding the angelic, if not squirmy, baby while a lactation consultant shows me how to get the perfect latch; when I don't feel one lick of jealousy when friends announce their pregnancies.

For me, I've graduated to a nice change of pace in life where I'm not obsessed with my menstrual cycle or preoccupied with when my fertile days may be. Yes, for me, knowing I was done having children was as easy as trusting my gut. But I know that it may not be that simple for everyone.

When did you know you were done having kids?

[photo credit: SXC]

Oh, Preschool, how I love thee.

Let me count the ways:

1. You provide my three-year-old daughter with intellectual and physical stimulation at a level of which I could never hope to provide her, even on my very best day (and this is why you won't catch me homeschooling my kids).

2. You teach her charming children's' songs whose lyrics I wish I could remember (Heck, I should remember them after singing them myself after all those years ago but two pregnancies stole my ability to remember much of anything these days.).

3. You give her a safe place to run and swing and jump and mess around with sand (and I don't even mind it when her shoes come home full of the stuff because I know what a blast she had).

4. You introduce her to friends, the friends she's come to love and whom she talks about, nonstop, when she's at home with me.

5. You broaden the world of my precocious little girl and keep her interested and entertained for a few hours each week so I can broaden my own world of work-from-home motherhood. Those hours you give me each week so I can spend uninterrupted time earning a paycheck and reacquainting myself with myself allow me the opportunity to be fully  present and accounted for when my daughter is back spending time with me. 

Ah, preschool, how we've missed you. Can't wait to see you again tomorrow morning. It's been FAR TOO LONG.

My Kids Registry loves Baby Potential!

Yvette over at My Kids Registry recently reviewed Baby Potential:

I LOVED THE QUALITY of the T-shirt and it's adorable design. My daughter wore it with a smile and I received a lot of compliments from other moms in her gym class. I am such a fan of good quality cotton T's.

Read her full review here.